This is a post that has been a long time in the making. As a hockey coach, I’ve had an informal set of “rules” that I’ve used to guide myself as both an assistant and coach. At the suggestion of a friend of mine, I’ve finally decided to put everything down. I’ll run down a summary of the rules and then expand on them individually. The rules can be summarized as:
- Never handle money
- Do unto other coaches as you would want them to do unto you
- Coaches shouldn’t outnumber players on the bench
- Don’t be afraid to look silly
- Worry about the recovery, not the mistake
- I’m the only one who gets to beak off to the refs
- If it ain’t worth a 3-game suspension, it ain’t worth a 2-minute penalty
- Politics suck
- Unless you’ve played the position, don’t mess with a goalie’s game
- If you have to puke, do it on the opposition’s bench
1. Money
This is my number one rule. With all the other responsibilities involved in running a team, handling money is best left to the Team Manager or Treasurer. People can get very funny about money and are quick to focus their anger if something seems amiss (even if it actually isn’t) so it is best to avoid any hassle in the first place.
2. Other Coaches
This rule can also be stated as: “Stay out of other coach’s kitchens if you expect them to stay out of yours”. In my opinion, this should also be the “golden” rule for all coaches. Every coach has their own way of running things. They have their own habits, tendencies, idiosyncrasies, and rules. They like their teams “just so” and they have reasons for that. I know I do, so the last thing I want is someone meddling (even if their intentions are good) on the team(s) I coach because they have a different way of doing things. As a coach, I therefore shouldn’t voice an unsolicited opinion to, or attempt to meddle in, another coach’s team.
As an assistant coach, I need to fully support the goals and direction the head coach sets for the team. If I can’t, I should step away rather than undermine things. A good example was when I was an assistant coach on a bantam team. A parent had issues with the way the head coach ran the team and this parent was not satisfied with the discussions they’d had with the coach. This parent had tried to talk me into agreeing with their point of view. I had no problem with the coach’s decisions and felt that they were reasonable under the circumstances so I simply told the parent that it was the head coach’s call and that any issues should be taken up with the coach or the board. That being said, if I felt that the coach had crossed a line, I would have taken it up with them or the board.
Corollary: I would much rather have no assistant coaches rather than people who are well meaning but aren’t on the same page as me.
3. Don’t Outnumber Your Players
This rule seems a little silly, but these are my rules so that’s ok. There is no point in having 5 coaches when you only have 4 players on the bench. There is only so much coaching that can be done at any one time so why not let one or more of the assistant coaches head up to the bar, or at the very least, get under the heaters in the stands?
4. Pride Goeth Before a Fall
Never be afraid to look a little silly. Pride and a desire to maintain control can make one look inflexible. I like to think I can laugh at myself and be comfortable with my players laughing at me, even just a little bit. I think it makes me a far more effective coach and may just allow me to make a better connection with my players. That being said, there is a line I draw between being laughed at because I did something silly, and being disrespected.
Corollary #1: Be prepared to admit to your mistakes. I make plenty of them and if I want to hold my players accountable, I need to make sure I am accountable to myself as well.
Corollary #2: I’m not against being on the receiving end of a practical joke now and again so as long as it is funny and non-destructive. My skates, glove, stick, car, and hat are all off limits though!
5. Mistakes
Mistakes aren’t all that important; recovery from the mistakes is what is most important. This rule is as much for me as a coach as it is for my players. One should never be afraid to do something because they might make a mistake. Once I’ve made a mistake, it’s done. I can’t go back and undo it so I just have to figure out how to do my best to recover from it. As a coach, my team needs me to focus on the recovery in the now so they can recover as a unit. Part of the recovery, of course, is figuring out what the mistake was and determining how to avoid it in the future.
Corollary: Try to make sure that you never make the same mistake twice; mistakes happen but try to make sure each one is a novel one. It’s more fun that way!
6. Beaking Off
I am usually in a position where I will be the one who will be held responsible for my team’s conduct towards the officials, therefore I am the only one who is allowed to beak off at them. Yelling at a referee never helps in the moment and can never benefit me in the long run, so why risk making things worse for the team? The calls the officials make or don’t make are out of my control so I can’t let myself lose focus on the parts of the game that I can control. I always strive to make my players and assistant coaches understand this. That being said, I believe that there may be the very rare occasion where you have to stand up for your team and confront officials, if only to bring your team together. This is one of those things that I’m constantly working on. Most games, I’m good, but there are some games where the calls, or more often non-calls, get under my skin and I find it tough to re-focus. This is a mistake and as per the previous rule, the recovery is the important thing.
Corollary: Fume. Re-focus. Move on. Simple, right?
Observation: Coaches really have very few good role models for dealing with officials. Think of all the hockey coaches in the media. How many times do you see a coach screaming at, or confronting the officials? 5 times per game? 10? More? This is at the NHL level, the international level, the AHL level, and the junior hockey level. Never mind the videos floating around of is happening at the minor hockey level. Where are the role models? How are coaches supposed to see how to act if all we see are the ones on TV losing their marbles at every little thing the officials do?
7. What Is It Worth?
If it isn’t worth a 3-game suspension, it isn’t worth a 2-minute minor. That’s a mantra I use for myself and for my players. It’s simple, if some kind of dumb play or stupid comment is likely to result in a penalty call against me or the team, why is it worth it? Unless it is worth getting suspended over, and there are a few things that are, then don’t do it. No beaking off to the officials. No retaliating for that hook or slash. No biting when the other team tries to get under your skin.
8. Politics
Avoid politics. Period. I’m not too good at the whole politics thing and I’ve gotten burned whenever I’ve gotten involved. I just want to show up and coach my team. I’m not saying not to fight for the important stuff, but just avoid the political games people try to play. It isn’t worth the trouble.
9. Goalies
Nothing is more dangerous than a little bit of knowledge about a particular subject. This is especially true with goaltending these days. I’ve never seriously played the position (just enough times to know it isn’t for me) and so much of the current way of playing is very technical. Goaltending is critical to any team and the last thing you want to do is mess that up. If you have a goalie who has a set style and they don’t ask for your opinion, let them play their game.
I remember my first game as a head coach. I was all prepared with what I wanted to say to the captains, the wingers, the centres, and the defense, but I had no idea what to say to the goalie. I brought it up with my assistant coach, Greg, and asked him what I should say. He told me that he’d been coaching for 25 years and he knew exactly what to do. He led me over to our goalie, looked her square in the eyes, and said, “Stop the puck.” That’s been what I’ve gone with since that first game.
10. Wait… What?
Yes, it’s silly. It’s supposed to be silly. It also makes a lot of sense if you think about it.
“If you have to throw up, throw up on the opposition’s bench.”
Whenever I say it I always manage to get a laugh, or at least a bemused look, out of a player if they aren’t feeling too well. If I can make a player feel a little better (or less worse), my job is made that much easier.
